Ammon's Address

Elder Tidwell
6500 Atherton St.
Long Beach 90815

So I loose Ammon's address constantly and I thought putting it here would be good for me and anyone else who needs it.

Jesus, the Very Thought of Thee..

A long time ago, okay, it seems like a long time ago but let's be real here; I haven't hit 30 yet so it wasn't that long ago when I was in the MTC. I had two wonderful companions, one of whom is now in MoTab and she's incredible. She's the one I want to talk about for a minute. One Sunday night at our weekly MTC fireside/devotional she sang this very song. I had heard this hymn before but I had never felt such a strong spirit as when she sang it that night. I love the first verse:
Jesus the very thought of thee
What sweetness fills my breast
But sweeter far thy face to see
And in thy presence rest
The second verse is also one of my favorites;
Nor voice can sing, nor heart can frame,
Nor can the mem'ry find
A sweeter sound than thy blest name,
O Savior of mankind!
I'm sure we all have a hymn or perhaps have felt the Spirit impress upon our minds and hearts a reminder of how much we love the Savior at some point in our lives. It may have been a Primary song, an EFY song (those always make Tyler get emotional ;) ), or maybe just listening to a hymn can cause us to have a reaffirmation of our testimony. That night was one of those moments for me in the MTC. I can't hear that song without feeling that same strong spirit I felt when my sweet MTC companion sang it. It reminds me how even thinking of our Savior can bring a certain spirit into our lives, our words become kinder, our actions become more meaningful, and it truly fills our minds and hearts with a peace, sweetness, and longing to meet our Savior and find rest with Him in the presence of our Heavenly Father. I can't think of Pres. Faust without connecting him to "This is the Christ" and Pres. Hinckley to " My Redeemer Lives." Music has a powerful influence and we are blessed to have hymns that can bring a sweet reminder to us of our love for our Heavenly Father and the Savior especially when we are in need of said reminder.
Switching gears a little bit as I was reading in Mosiah this week I love Mosiah but I enjoyed Chapter five a little more this time. Maybe I'm in need of something and found whatever my soul was hungering for in its verses. I love the reminder we have that we are made free and offered the granted the gift of salvation because we have made covenants and will be found at the right hand of God based on our obedience of course. I can't forget this simple phrase in verse 12 that I need to remember as I go through life each day.
" Retain the name written always in your hearts."
Going back to the effects of the hymn that I love so dearly because it awakens my spirit to a remembrance of my love for the Savior, is it His name written in my heart? I surely believe that it is though sometimes if one were to  look it may be slightly faded as I do err daily. I want you all to know I do have a testimony of our Savior, of the power of His example, the Atonement, and of His love for each of us.  Love you guys, hopefully my jumbled thoughts make some sense :)
Kelly Kelly

His Peace

     I've dreaded these past four months since Travis started school 3 1/2 years ago. I mean come on it’s no secret that I am CUH-RAZY about that 6’1” tower of awesomeness and being away from him sounded miserable. (I don’t know how you all can be away from him on a regular basis) And while yes I would never in a million years choose to be apart this long I think I will cherish the things I've learned in the past few months forever. I could write a million posts about everything I've learned but I think a 4 word sermon could sum up the most important thing Go to the temple! Well ok you guys know I can’t say anything in just 4 words so I’ll expound a little bit.

    When Travis started school we made a goal to get to the temple every month. I’ve watched as this goal has helped us have a more eternal perspective on this whole med school experience which in turn has taken away so much potential stress.  Well I thought I would be exempt from this goal during these months he was away. I told myself Karen you have 4 kids a nursing baby a two hour drive to the closest temple and no husband. You’re excused for these 4 months. However the spirit said “um… haven’t you learned anything about the peace the temple brings, you need the temple now more than ever. “ So I put my faith in the Lord that if I kept my goal of monthly attendance a way would be provided. Somehow each month it has continued to happen and I have once again been reminded that in this gospel there really is no such thing as a sacrifice because we are “unprofitable servants” and every attempt we make to sacrifice something, the blessings will come back a hundred fold.

President Monson has said that “ As we go to the holy house, as we remember the covenants we make therein, we will be able to bear every trial and overcome each temptation. The temple provides purpose for our lives. It brings peace to our souls.” I have felt that peace carry me through what I thought was going to be a huge trial for me. As I have seen my bond with Travis only grow stronger I have been reminded that the only true way to strengthen our relationship with our spouse is to strengthen our relationship with Jesus Christ.

     In the Lectures on Faith Joseph Smith outlined the three things necessary to understand our relationship with God in order to exercise Faith in him they are “First; a knowledge that God exists second ;correct ideas of his character, perfections and attributes and third that the course we are pursuing is according to his mind and will”. I don’t think anything helps to accomplish those three things and in turn strengthen our faith in Jesus Christ more than the temple. It testifies of him, teaches us about him and his true nature and shows us how to become like him.

     So much of the temple from the outside of the building to the baptistery to the endowment is symbolic. I think I’ve always thought that symbols must have 1 specific meaning that I’m supposed to figure out.  This last time I finally came to a realization that that is not true. There is not some test I’ll ever take to figure out what all the symbols mean. What I’m supposed to be learning is whatever the spirit teaches me that day and use it to draw closer to Christ with the understanding it may be something completely new and different next time. We’re so used to a specific set of correct answers that it becomes easy to over think the gospel and the temple. I think the purpose of symbolism is to take a normal object or sign and find out how it testifies of Jesus Christ and then bring that mentality out into the world. Look at the general authorities and how they are able to use almost everything from sports, street signs, jobs, sickness, art projects, planes and even pickles to find symbolism in to help bring them closer to God.  I believe that is a result of the training they receive in the temple that all things good testify of the Savior.  

     I have felt the spirit of the temple in my life and experienced the peace it brings. It is the ultimate pure form of service beside parenthood that we have to offer. It is the one place as Elder Bednar puts that “we more completely and fully take upon us the name of Jesus Christ.” It is where we find His peace to get us through whatever awaits us outside its walls. 

"The Language of our Fathers"

In the first chapter of 1 Nephi, Nephi talks about being taught in all the learning of his father including his language which we know was reformed Egyptian which they used to engrave the plates. Later in the chapter Nephi speaks of another part of the language of his father.

14 ....Great and marvelous are thy works, O Lord God Almighty! Thy throne is high in the heavens, and thy power, and goodness, and mercy are over all the inhabitants of the earth; and, because thou art merciful, thou wilt not suffer those who come unto thee that they shall perish!

15 And after this manner was the language of my father....

In the March Ensign of 1994 there is an article entitled "Helping Children Hear the Still, Small Voice" in it there is a paragraph that Karen shared with me that really got me thinking. It reads: Many teachers of foreign languages believe that children learn a language best in “immersion programs,” in which they are surrounded by other speakers of the language and called upon to speak it themselves. They learn not just to say words, but to speak fluently and even to think in the new language. The proper “immersion” setting for a spiritual education is in the home, where spiritual principles can form the basis for daily living. “And thou shalt teach [the Lord’s words] diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up” (Deut. 6:7).

I feel this is precisely the experience Nephi had with his parents and I know this was the experience we had being raised by Tid and Rose. I would encourage all of us to make this a part of our homes to ensure that our children are being immersed in the gospel. There is a great talk by Elder Holland entitled "A Prayer for the Children" that speaks of this that I would encourage all of you to read.

Oh That I Were An Angel

     Saul and David are returning home after David has slain Goliath and Saul begins to be very upset.  His rages increases when some people praising them say "Saul has killed his thousands but David has killed his tens of thousands." At this moment Saul begins to be jealous of David, but the most interesting part is that he tears down his own accomplishments because someone else performed better than him.  

     We all have these Saul moments and so did Alma in Alma 29.  He says his famous oh that I were an angel speech. But let’s think about where he was coming from. His best friends had just returned from the Laminates with ridiculous amounts of success in bringing the laminates to the truth. Alma had just returned from Ammoniah a city that had to be destroyed because of its wickedness. It can be assumed that Alma was a little jealous of his friends and probably started to tear down his own accomplishments.  But Alma being the great guy that he is catches his self just as we all must when we have our Saul moments.  First he realizes all the blessings in his life. Then he realizes that God knows his purpose, and God will give him what he needs to accomplish those things. The result is in Alma 29:14 "but I do not joy in my own success alone, but my joy is more full because of the success of my brethren, who have been up to the land of Nephi" This is amazing to me, what was once bringing him down suddenly becomes  a part of his joy.  Counting our blessings doesn’t just make us more joyful in our own blessings, but also in the blessings of others. 

      I was amazed when I learned this in seminary and started to examine myself for the Saulness in me.  As you all know Ammon is my closest sibling in both age and relationship. We always had the same friends and spent a lot of time together.  What you all also know is that Ammon is an incredible people person, everyone loves him because he has a fantastic personality.  If you were to ask me before today if I ever got jealous of him I would say never.  But upon examining my self today I realized how often I tore down my blessings because of Ammon's blessings.  I always wanted to be a great communicator and for the past few months have been praying for that gift.  As you could probably guess by talking to me, I am still don’t have that charismatic personality. But after learning about Alma I realized that I was praying for the wrong reasons, sure my intentions were good just as Alma's but we both sinned in the fact that we let other peoples success get in the way of realizing our own blessings.  I was praying not to be the person God wanted me to be but was tearing down the person I was.  It wasn’t about improvement it was about changing myself.   God knows us each individually He knows what gifts we need to accomplish our purpose.  

       When we look at what we have and would accomplish, we would not give it up for what we wish we had.  As you can guess my prayers are a little different now I do not pray to have a charismatic personality I pray for the ability to accomplish the tasks I need to fulfil His purposes.  We have all the energy in the world to be ourselves but once we try to be someone else we become exhausted.  So examine your lives and have an Alma moment whenever you have a Saul moment because we all get jealous, but what’s important is that we don’t let is consume us. We need not say oh that I were an angel or oh that I was charismatic or oh that I was in this financial situation.  All need to say and work towards is Oh that I was the Eli (you fill in your name instead of mine) that God wants be to be and then work with him to be it.
-Cheesy "the blog hog" Tidwell

p.s. sorry if you read this before I edited it I think is was confusing before

p.s.s sorry for being a blog hog but I keep learning a lot of lessons about myself that I feel I need to share.

p.s.s.s I am glad I am related to all of you. Your testimonies strengthen me so much and you have done things for me for which I could never express.  I’m so grateful for this blog! It seems like you guys post things right when I need them the most and you’re all so full of insight and testimony.

Do We Know What We Have?

Dear precious ones, I'm thinking how very gratful I am for the power in the Priesthood.What a powerfull manifestation of Heavenly Father's love for us. Homework from mother and grandmother: Read and ponder Gen. Conf. talk by Carole M. Stephens, Do We Know What We Have? Know that I pray for each one of you every day, you are all so very amazing and I'm am so thankful for you all. Stay true to the Faith the Way back to Father in Heaven, because of our Savior's selfless Atonement. I   love you all so very, very eternaly much. Love, Momma and Grandma

Purity

Here's a little philosophical food for thought. :)

A few weeks ago I took my niece to a fireside where Sheri Dew was the main speaker. At one point in her talk she briefly mentioned how we should all be on a quest to become more pure--more pure in the way we dress, the things we say, the things we read, watch, and listen to etc.--then she moved on to other topics.

I was struck by the word pure and pondered it for a while after the talk was over. After pondering I discovered why I was so intrigued by Sister Dew's word choice. I usually think in terms of "good" or "bad" when I'm deciding whether to watch, listen to, read, wear, or say something. This is problematic though because so many things are a combination of good and bad. I usually deem something "good" if the uplifting and true parts in it outweigh the negative and false parts of it, and something is "bad" if the opposite is true.

But what would happen if I started thinking in terms of purity instead? Something can only be pure, by definition, if it is completely untainted. It cannot be a mix of good and bad parts. It has to be all one or the other. Purity is such a clear standard. It is easy to decide if something is pure or not--much easier than determining if something is good.

Striving to participate in and surround myself and my family with only pure things is such an inspiring, and incredibly difficult, goal. But I think I'm going to go for it.

Your devoted fan,

Sarah

Tender Mercies

In Elizabeth Smart's book, My Story, she tells of a time when something had happened, when her captures had been down in the city, that made them extra nervous to go down to the stream, their only water source up in the mountains. They tried to ration the water, but of course, it soon ran out. They had gone a day without water, and Elizabeth was hot and miserable. Night came, and she fell asleep. Something woke her up, she looked around and there, right next to her pillow, was a yellow cup, full of cold water. She wondered where it had come from, it obviously wasn't from her captures, there was none in their camp. The only explanation was that it was a tender mercy from God. Why would He do it though, she asked herself. She wasn't going to die, her captures wouldn't have let it go that far. It was God showing her that He loved her, he wouldn't leave her. No, He couldn't take away her captures agency, but He could comfort her, He could lift her with His tender mercies. God loves each of us so much, and blesses each of us with tender mercies. They may not be as obvious as finding a yellow cup of water by our pillow, but they help us through our trials just as much. I know that God lives and will not leave us comfortless.

Love,

Brielle Emily 

The McFlurry of Life

     I have recently learned to love the story of Zeezrom.  In the beginning he is described as being expert in the devices of the devil and eventually become a really great missionary all though we never get to hear about it.  But there is a city named after him so he must have been pretty cool.  Anyways after Amulek is able to show Zeezrom of the wrong of his ways Zeezrom asks a question (in verse 8) that I think we all ask at least to our selfs every once and awhile, he basically asks and pardon my french "am  I screwed" or "does God really want me after what I have done?".  Alma answers his question with the Plan of Salvation.  He tells the story of how Adam and Eve were tempted by the Devil to partake of the tree of knowledge of good and evil. Now why would satan want to do that? He must of known that if they never partaken of the tree that they would stay in the garden of eden and he would have won because no one could have progressed, no one would ever be born etc.  But what his plan was, was to have them partake of the other tree in the garden, the tree of life, right after they partook  of the tree of knowledge of good and evil. What he was trying to do was to eliminate the state we are in, which is the probationary state. Now luckily for us God is on our side and he guarded the tree of life with a cherubim and a flaming sword. (still have no idea what a cherubim is). So we are all in a probationary state. Now I know at least for me that that sounds like a bad thing because of the context "probationary" is often used in.  But in reality, as Alma points out, it means a learning or preparatory  period.  If you got a job at McDonalds for the first week or so you would be on probation which would mean that it was a time for you to learn how to do the job.  So if you messed up on your first McFlurries it was okay and also expected of you.  That probationary state is not for being perfect it is the time for you to learn and to prepare for when your off probation.  Although life is much more difficult than making a McFlurry this principle still applies, not only are we allowed to make mistakes but were expected to that is why we have an Atonement.  So when we get down on our selves about not being perfect we are actually being counter-productive, and we need to do is to learn from our mistakes so that when it comes time for us to be able to make the McFlurry we are ready.  And also on the flip side we have the McFlurry protégée on our side who is not there to make us look bad but to teach us what he knows about McFlurry making (John 3:17). Its interesting to me in the Book of Mormon how Mormon out of all the stories that he had available to him he chose to include several stories of people like both the Alma's and Zeezrom and even Amulek who wasn't  bad but wasn't   living to his potential. God didn't just shun these people off He wanted them to repent and helped them to do so.  I think Mormon put these stories in because He knew in our day that we would need to know the true nature of God and that He knows us and loves us and wants us to repent, He doesn't expect us to be perfect but He does expect us to have that  desire to be perfect. If we never work on the McFlurry we never will be able to make it. But its not yet time for us to have it down.  We learn Grace for grace, first we learn how much milk to add then how to mix it etc.
      I know I go on forever but this is my last though the scriptures talk a lot about how God is all knowing and powerful and just awesome God is, because He is. But they also talks a lot about how much God loves us.  Put those two things together.  The Person who knows all loves you, He knows what is worthy of love, he knows what is true greatness.  And He loves you!! You are worthy of His love He knows who you are inside and who you can become, better than you do.  He knows and loves you because you are worthy of His love you are a Son or Daughter of God and are capable of what only He fully knows, but it must be great.  For a long period of my life I struggled with loving others because I struggled with loving myself. My view of God was distorted and I defiantly didn't try to bring him into my life and often pushed Him away to dangerous distances, even trying to convince my self that He didn't exist.  It wasn't until trek that I prayed to know if God loved me.  Immediately when I did I was filled with His love, as if He were there holding me and telling me so, that changed everything for me. My trails never left me and I still make a lot of mistakes but I know who is on my side.  I think this is what 1 John 4:7-8 is all about. God really is love and when we feel at times He isn't,  its our view of Him that is distorted and we need at those times to pray to know if God loves us.  So I challenge you all to pray any time you feel that your not loved to know if God loves you He will answer and it will change everything. I am so Grateful for my Savior and His Atonement because I can "become" what He wants me to be and to be with my Heavenly Father who loves me.  I am so grateful for all of your examples you have set for me and all your support.  I truly do love all of you and am so glad I am in this family.  The Church is true. God speaks to the Prophet because He loves us. God provided us the scriptures and the plan of salvation because he loves us.  I know this, and am so grateful of all of your guy's support in helping my testimony to grow. In the name of our loving Savior, Jesus Christ Amen
--Eli Pearson Tidwell

We Belong!

Have you ever felt like you don't really fit in with the organization you belong to in the ward? Is Relief Society too old,  is Primary too childish, is Young Men's too weird, are the High Priests too old? I don't know about you but when I first went to Relief Society I felt like the women in there were too old and some were of the elderly kind but most were not. Little did I know that being over the age of 25 makes you feel incredibly old when you see Young Women come in or being 25 and up you are viewed as "old" by the Young Women sometimes. I guess that's what I get for being so judgmental and not having the vision the Lord wanted us to have of the organizations in the church. President Packer in a Conference address in 1998 was talking about Relief Society but I think his words can be applied to anyone and everyone. He said, "Too many sisters, however, think that Relief Society is merely a class to attend. The same sense of belonging to the Relief Society rather than just attending a class must be fostered in the heart of every woman. Sisters, you must graduate from thinking that you only attend Relief Society to feeling that you belong to it!"How often do we make a conscious effort to participate in the lesson, to consciously sit by someone instead of by ourselves and expect someone to talk to us. It can be very difficult. Maybe none of you are as self-centered as I tend to be and sometimes I fall into that trap of not moving after Sunday School to sit by another sister , talk to her, and then the lesson starts and I enjoy the lesson but never let anyone know I have a testimony of what is being taught. Hey, I'm human and in this I do constantly err. I think that's why the Lord inspires my local leaders to assign me subjects for talks on things like forgiveness and repentance, etc. It is time for me to recognize and truly believe that I belong to Relief Society always, no matter what calling I have been given that may take me out of the meeting on Sundays. We made a covenant at baptism that includes these things that I just loved to share with my investigators and members on my mission which can be found in Mosiah 18:8-11.
   8 And it came to pass that he said unto them: Behold, here are the waters of Mormon (for thus were they called) and now, as ye are desirous to come into the fold of God, and to be called his people, and are willing to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light;

 9 Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that ye may be in, even until death, that ye may be redeemed of God, and be numbered with those of the first resurrection, that ye may have eternal life—

 10 Now I say unto you, if this be the desire of your hearts, what have you against being baptized in the name of the Lord, as a witness before him that ye have entered into a covenant with him, that ye will serve him and keep his commandments, that he may pour out his Spirit more abundantly upon you?

 11 And now when the people had heard these words, they clapped their hands for joy, and exclaimed: This is the desire of our hearts.

There is so much strength, joy, and love to be found by knowing and believing that we belong and that we have made the choice with our friends and family to belong. We belong to the true church on the earth, we belong to a wonderful family, we belong to our respective organizations, and mostly we belong to our Heavenly Father who loves us unconditionally. I know we can be a greater force for good as we share our testimony, our experiences, and our love for each other in our meetings but also as we recognize we belong and act accordingly.
I tend to, ok, so I always ramble but I love you all and I hope this wasn't too confusing.
Kelly Kelly

A great year

Yesterday I went to the temple.  I had a thought in my mind, how many of the people around me in the temple, turn down callings.   I know there are more than I could emagian.  I was told that it is the strength of there conversion.  When a calling is given, they look at it as a responsibility, not a opportunity of growth that it really is.  They also look at it as a calling from a bishop, not from a Heavenly Father who knows our needs and the needs of others we can effect.  We may not be in a calling that is needed by anyone else but for our growth.  We may also be in a calling that will just save one person.  I want all my children, and Grandchildren to know that God knows us. He knows our strengths and weaknesses and will give us challenges to progress.  The callings we receive, and the challenges we face in this world, are there for our benefit, not to punish us or beat us down.   We will not have any challenge in our life that we can't do, or that is more than we can overcome.   We can also know that Our Savior is with us, holding us up and sometimes carrying us.   At the beginning of this year, I felt like this was going to be a great year.  In this time, I have had more pain than I ever have had in my life.  It has been frustrating to me, but in this time, I have found a closer relationship with my Father.  I know the times when I have had bad times with pain that I didn't think I could get through, I felt his hand in my life helping me get through it.  Because of that, I don't pray to have this gone.  I know he will take care of that when the time comes.  This has been one of the hardest years in my life, but it is a great year because of the testimony that I have received through it.   I now know I can do hard things.   Always face problems not feeling sorry for ourselves, ( I do have a few episodes of that) but remember that This life is for growth not just to be easy.   Remember that Our Savior went through more than us.  We are not greater than he is.  We all need the challenges to make us strong.  Alway fact them in that attitude.  we will be better when we pass through them.   This has  been my Year and a Great one.  I am so proud to be the Parent of such amazing Children and Grandchildren. You are my Reward for any good I have done.   Thank you all for your strength and wisdom.      

Papa Tid