The McFlurry of Life

     I have recently learned to love the story of Zeezrom.  In the beginning he is described as being expert in the devices of the devil and eventually become a really great missionary all though we never get to hear about it.  But there is a city named after him so he must have been pretty cool.  Anyways after Amulek is able to show Zeezrom of the wrong of his ways Zeezrom asks a question (in verse 8) that I think we all ask at least to our selfs every once and awhile, he basically asks and pardon my french "am  I screwed" or "does God really want me after what I have done?".  Alma answers his question with the Plan of Salvation.  He tells the story of how Adam and Eve were tempted by the Devil to partake of the tree of knowledge of good and evil. Now why would satan want to do that? He must of known that if they never partaken of the tree that they would stay in the garden of eden and he would have won because no one could have progressed, no one would ever be born etc.  But what his plan was, was to have them partake of the other tree in the garden, the tree of life, right after they partook  of the tree of knowledge of good and evil. What he was trying to do was to eliminate the state we are in, which is the probationary state. Now luckily for us God is on our side and he guarded the tree of life with a cherubim and a flaming sword. (still have no idea what a cherubim is). So we are all in a probationary state. Now I know at least for me that that sounds like a bad thing because of the context "probationary" is often used in.  But in reality, as Alma points out, it means a learning or preparatory  period.  If you got a job at McDonalds for the first week or so you would be on probation which would mean that it was a time for you to learn how to do the job.  So if you messed up on your first McFlurries it was okay and also expected of you.  That probationary state is not for being perfect it is the time for you to learn and to prepare for when your off probation.  Although life is much more difficult than making a McFlurry this principle still applies, not only are we allowed to make mistakes but were expected to that is why we have an Atonement.  So when we get down on our selves about not being perfect we are actually being counter-productive, and we need to do is to learn from our mistakes so that when it comes time for us to be able to make the McFlurry we are ready.  And also on the flip side we have the McFlurry protégée on our side who is not there to make us look bad but to teach us what he knows about McFlurry making (John 3:17). Its interesting to me in the Book of Mormon how Mormon out of all the stories that he had available to him he chose to include several stories of people like both the Alma's and Zeezrom and even Amulek who wasn't  bad but wasn't   living to his potential. God didn't just shun these people off He wanted them to repent and helped them to do so.  I think Mormon put these stories in because He knew in our day that we would need to know the true nature of God and that He knows us and loves us and wants us to repent, He doesn't expect us to be perfect but He does expect us to have that  desire to be perfect. If we never work on the McFlurry we never will be able to make it. But its not yet time for us to have it down.  We learn Grace for grace, first we learn how much milk to add then how to mix it etc.
      I know I go on forever but this is my last though the scriptures talk a lot about how God is all knowing and powerful and just awesome God is, because He is. But they also talks a lot about how much God loves us.  Put those two things together.  The Person who knows all loves you, He knows what is worthy of love, he knows what is true greatness.  And He loves you!! You are worthy of His love He knows who you are inside and who you can become, better than you do.  He knows and loves you because you are worthy of His love you are a Son or Daughter of God and are capable of what only He fully knows, but it must be great.  For a long period of my life I struggled with loving others because I struggled with loving myself. My view of God was distorted and I defiantly didn't try to bring him into my life and often pushed Him away to dangerous distances, even trying to convince my self that He didn't exist.  It wasn't until trek that I prayed to know if God loved me.  Immediately when I did I was filled with His love, as if He were there holding me and telling me so, that changed everything for me. My trails never left me and I still make a lot of mistakes but I know who is on my side.  I think this is what 1 John 4:7-8 is all about. God really is love and when we feel at times He isn't,  its our view of Him that is distorted and we need at those times to pray to know if God loves us.  So I challenge you all to pray any time you feel that your not loved to know if God loves you He will answer and it will change everything. I am so Grateful for my Savior and His Atonement because I can "become" what He wants me to be and to be with my Heavenly Father who loves me.  I am so grateful for all of your examples you have set for me and all your support.  I truly do love all of you and am so glad I am in this family.  The Church is true. God speaks to the Prophet because He loves us. God provided us the scriptures and the plan of salvation because he loves us.  I know this, and am so grateful of all of your guy's support in helping my testimony to grow. In the name of our loving Savior, Jesus Christ Amen
--Eli Pearson Tidwell